my sweet friends ~ Shawny & IA-y ~ have started this new linky party. We are supposed to just "talk".... tell a funny story, what's going on in your life, what nots.....and knowing all my galpals out there, they will have some very funny stories to tell.
But me?
Yah. I don't know. I have been brainstorming for days what to "talk" to y'all about.
Should I admit that I am juggling 16 balls in the air right now and my priorities are so screwed up that I dropped one yesterday? I forgot Sis's Ortho appointment, and she (THE 10 YEAR OLD) reminded me. Damn PTA. Damn blogs. Damn grocery store. and cleaning house. and laundry.
boring.....
How about the fact that Bubba has turned into a MAJOR STINKER. He was my sweet boy, who sat quietly in his stroller, happy with watching the world go by. But something happened a few weeks ago and now he arches his back and pitches a fit!
I used to be able to got to lunch with girlfriends with him...not anymore. He throws plates and knives and food. nice.
I used to be able to run a few errands with him...nope. He has different ideas than sitting in the shopping cart and letting me get done.
I used to be able to take him up to school and get a few things done for PTA...nada. He wants to run into the kids' classrooms. ugh!
He is now the kid that everyone silently tells themselves, "oh, thank God mine wasn't like that."
Case in Point:
Last week, while waiting in line at our local Post Office (sidebar- I HATE our Post Office - the Postmasters are mean & grumpy - think Soup Nazi) Bubba took off. So I kindly asked the gentleman in front of me if I can go chase after him, would he hold my place in line. I am running all over the damn Post Office chasing a giggly boy (who thinks it's hysterical). But then it's my turn. As I'm at the counter, working as fast as I can to get my stuff mailed, I turn back to see my boy swinging from the counter, kicking his shoes off and charming the fool out of the other people in line. Even the Postmaster smiled a tiny smile.
Me? I was horrified - bare feet at the Post Office??!!! I was never supposed to "be that mom". My little backwoods Bubba with dirty feet had a blast. Me? Not so much.
At church on Sunday, he wanted to and play in the big water feature - heck, with the drought we have, I don't blame him. When I wouldn't let him, he threw himself on the floor kicking & screaming. At church. God granted me strength then...but how long will it last????
And yesterday, at the forgotten ortho appt (we showed up late), he wanted out of his stroller, so he threw a fit. He wanted to go back with his sister, so he threw a fit. He wanted a snack, but not the one I brought him, so he threw a fit..... see the pattern I am dealing with? Ironically, Dr. Phil was talking about children who thrown tantrums in public on the tv in the waiting room...but I didn't get to listen b/c I was dealing with my own kid's tantrums. ARGH!
We sat in the car during the bulk of that appointment.
He is most definitely strong-willed. He wants what he wants and will pitch a fit until he gets it. I'm trying to set limits and establish boundaries, but it's so hard when all I really want to do is give in.
So, that's what's in my head at this current moment.
Hear me out - I love my baby boy - love love love him. I will be challenged while raising him. We will battle - and I hope this is a SHORT phase and I get my sweet boy back.
Whew - that was like a 3 cup of coffee conversation. But I did all the talking - any advice for me?????
14 comments:
It seems to me that you're doing everything right. STAY CONSISTENT! If he finds out even once that by throwing a fit he'll get his way you've lost my friend.
We've all been there, standing in the middle of a public place with an out of control child. Getting nasty looks and unnecessary advice from those who have forgotten how wee-one can act. Don't worry your pretty little head over it, you'll be having lunch with your friends with a happy, well behaved Bubba again soon because this is just a stage. He's testing you, be smarter than him and you win!
I think you are lying!!
The video of the little sweetheart that you sent me yesterday could not have done all of those things!!
Kidding.
2 is a terrible thing!
when my oldest pitched a fit in public, over a bag of chips, I just stepped over her and walked out. Magically she stopped. I was lucky.
I have my own two year old terror. although his fits tend to run to poor me side of things rather than the angry side. Still it's hard being consistent when all you want to do is stop the fussing. Hang in there, that's what I keep telling myself.
Ooh...tough one. One thing is that you have to find out what discipline works for him...all I had to do with Jamison is talk to her, but with Caleb we...well, we spank. With Caleb I had to "train" him, if you will, on first time obedience. The first time he did not answer or respond to instruction there was a consequence. It would be a slight pop of the hand or a time out. I just had to be consistent and stay on top of him constantly (which was hard in the beginning). Or you could explain your expectations of him before you arrive at your location...we are going to the post office (side note: they are so rude, I agree) and I expect you to stand right next to me until we are done, then we can leave for the park, for example. Trail and error...you have to find what works for Bubba. And take a deep breath every now and then.
Trial and error...not trail...geez!
So this is what I have to look forward to? She already embarrasses me with her temper in public so I've quit taking her to lunch with me. And dinner. She does ok at the grocery store and she will allow me ONE ERRAND in public. After that, she's done.
It sounds like you're doing everything right. Keep doing what you're doing and don't give in. The first time you do, he knows he won and will do it again.
Ironically, my mom had to read Strong Willed Child when I was a teenager. I think that's the same book. It was Dobson for sure. I also had to have counseling in high school. I really hope Emma takes after her daddy.
THANK YOU BUNCHES for linking up! xoxox
Stopping by from Impulsive Addict, and love your blog :)
I am right there with you on the back curling, fit throwing, screaming in public right now. I didn't know what to do yesterday when food was being thrown out of the cart. This was a first for me. My 2 year old has always been so good, but another life form has taken over him lately!!
Ahhhh I feel for you. I have no advice though, wanna know why... I've got 2 at that stage right now. My almost 4 year old should be out of it but NOOOO she is definitely my challenge & now my just turned 2 year old is becoming her sister... LORD HELP ME! :)
holy smokes mama that sounds like an over active little boy! kids will be kids and i hope that you keep finding the strength :) xoxo
Oh man, good luck! Sounds like you're on the right track with reading the books and attempting to control the behavior. Don't give in! These stories make me nervous about future parenthood. I'll be hitting you up for advice in a few years and see how it all panned out. :-)
My Lucas was all sorts of strong will and crazy at times- I think I blocked a lot of it out too. But I think I remember talking with him a lot before we would do things, explaining what we would be doing and what was expected- but at some ages it seems like you just have to hide from public or a few months :)
I'm giggling but it's really not that funny. :(
i need to read that book. i desperately need to read that book.
cooper is out of control. he, too, pitches fit about everything and anything. & he tests me all the time! the drama just gets so overwhelming that I find myself saying "whatever, I don't care, do what you want" when I know that is the worst thing I can do. I never thought I'd be "that mom" but I guess I am!
we went to monkey joes today and he was an angel - until he tried to bite a kid who wanted to go down the slide he was blocking. and when I took him to the dentist last weekend, he again tried to bite a kid who wanted his toy. AND he bit twice at daycare.
I am at my wit's end.
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